Stop Pushing Your Partner Away When You Feel Hurt.
A live, research-grounded membership where you learn to
change patterns not partners and build secure love that lasts.
Counselling / Speaking / Research
A live, research-grounded membership where you learn to
change patterns not partners and build secure love that lasts.
Counselling / Speaking / Research
You're not imagining it. And it's not your fault.
You start conversations calmly… then suddenly feel overwhelmed
You shut down, lash out, or push them away
Conflict feels intense, confusing, or impossible to repair
You feel anxious, unsafe, or emotionally drained afterward
You're stuck in a pattern your nervous system learned. And no one ever showed you how to change it.
You're not reacting this way because you're "too emotional" or "bad at relationships."
You're reacting because your nervous system is trying to protect you.
And when it senses threat, even emotional threat, it takes over. That's why:
You say things you don't mean
You shut down when you want to stay connected
You feel overwhelmed in moments that should feel safe
Until you learn how to work with your nervous system, not against it, these patterns will keep repeating.
The Secure Love Lab™ is Dr Lisa’s membership community where The SECURE Method™ is taught, a simple, structured system that helps you interrupt destructive patterns in real time and replace them with calm, grounded responses.
Start Interrupting the Pattern →So you're supported as you change real patterns, not just learn concepts
To help you stay calm in the exact moments you'd normally get triggered
So you always know what to do when emotions spike
So you can revisit and reinforce what works
Relationship scientist. Trauma-informed clinician. Internationally accredited family legal mediator. Dr Lisa Kleyn holds a PhD in Psychology from the Universities of Oxford and Cape Town. Her doctoral research on social network influence in relationships is published and WHOaligned, and it forms the scientific foundation of everything inside The Secure Love Lab™.
She has worked clinically across South Africa, Oxford, and London, in inpatient, day-clinic, and residential trauma settings, with a specialist focus on attachment injuries, high-conflict couples, and the kind of relational patterns that feel impossible to shift alone.
“My focus is practical: reduce reactivity, restore safety and trust, and deliver change that endures.”
Where The SECURE Method™ is taught, practised, and lived
Dr Lisa’s membership community and the home of The SECURE Method™. Live coaching calls, on-demand tools, guided practice, and a community doing the same work. The method is the science. The Lab is where you live it.
“I joined on the monthly plan and upgraded to annual within a week. It’s the most practical relationship programme I’ve found.”
Emma R. · Dublin, IE · SECURE Method™ Member
Both plans include full access + all bonuses. This is founding member pricing, it will increase.
30-day guarantee · cancel anytime
🔒 Secure checkout · Instant access · 30-day money-back guarantee · Powered by Stripe
Try the SECURE Method™ membership for a full 30 days. Watch the modules. Join a live coaching call. Use the tools in your real relationship moments. Connect with the community.
If it's not the right fit for you, for any reason, just send me a message and I'll refund every single penny.
No hoops. No hard feelings. No questions asked.
Dr Lisa Kleyn, Relationship Scientist & Trauma-Informed Clinician
Founding member pricing is available for a limited time only
You can learn how to feel calm, secure, and in control, even in the moments that used to overwhelm you.
Stop Repeating the Pattern →Get instant access and begin changing your relationship patterns today.
